Help Them Help You!!

Anyone ever heard of the freshman 15, what about the newlywed's ever so common 'happy fat', the mommy pudge, or the empty nester's extra fluff. These are things that go hand in hand with crucial changes in a persons life. You see when the support system around you isn't 100% on board it can be extremely difficult to have lasting success and stay motivated. Sometimes they do it intentionally but I would say that 95% of the time they don't even realize they are doing it.

I have several friends who are currently going through this, and that is what has spawned this blog. I got a text today, a call yesterday, and had a talk at bible study not long ago all venting and needing some feed back on what to do when family members and friends have a hard time with your new healthy lifestyle.

As you all know, Justin and I have been fortunate enough to have each other to lean on during the last half of my weight loss journey, but it hasn't always been that way for me. Don't get me wrong having a spouse to hold you accountable and keep you on target makes eating right and exercising so much easier, but like I said it hasn't always been that way. My history of attempting life change started and failed a long time before I met my sweet husband.

How many of you know a couple who struggle with this exact situation: "He just doesn't understand what I am going through, he can eat what ever he wants and not gain an ounce"

Or the friends that say "Oh come on you can have that piece of cake, you deserve it! You've been working so hard."

Or the husband that is so sweet to fix (or buy) dinner while you are running the kids to their practices but you come home to enchiladas with extra cheese and a cheesecake for dessert. He brought you this because he knows they're your favorite and you are seething mad because you cannot eat them.

You see they are trying to make you happy, trying to be kind and supportive, and trying to love you but what they don't realize is that they are tempting you and causing you to take 1 step forward and 2 steps back. I am not going to lie to you this is a tough situation. You love these people and they love you! That is why this conflict is so tough. The best way to handle it is to address it straight up.

When you decide what eating plan and exercise routine works for you, let them know exactly what your plan is. Ask them to hold you accountable, or take it a step further and ask them to join you. Let them know the best thing they can do to support you is not to tempt you, and to encourage you to stay on plan.

1 Corinthians 8:13 says "Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause him to fall."

If they are eating your favorite thing in the world (for me that would be carrot cake) and you know that just one bite of that can send you into a downward spiral of junk eating and a backslide for the record books, let them know that. Just simply ask them not to bring it around you. You would never offer an alcoholic a glass of the Merlot they used to call their favorite would you? Or someone trying to quit smoking a puff on your cigarette? No that's just cruel. The same is said for someone who is trying to break a cycle of bad eating.

My father is a recovering alcoholic. He tells me all the time that if he ever had to restrict his eating he would go crazy. This coming from a man who quit drinking cold turkey 5.5 years ago and never looked back. Junk food addiction is real, and we should be able to talk to each other about it.

Have a real conversation with them, let them know exactly what you need for them to support you. Once you are strong in your will it wont be as hard to turn down tasty treats, and once you are at a place that it wont cause a back slide or binge you will be able to have small quantities of those treats!

I know it may sound nice on paper and you are thinking yeah whatever Ryan, you can say that all you want but you don't know how they will react. Well, no I don't know them, but if they really love you they will want you to be happy, and if you're not happy with the way you feel in your current state they will help you get to that happy place, you just have to be straight with them and hold strong to your convictions!

photo credit:www.myrecipes.com -uniquehealthandwellness.com 

New side by side!

I finally took a few miniutes to make a new before and after side by side! I will post another post soon, but just wanted to get it on here!

Also if you are not currently following our Facebook page please come visit!
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Better Than Vegan Dinner Party

Justin and I are constantly getting asked how we have achieved and maintained successful weight loss.  The actual equation for weight loss is simple, eat less and exercise more. However there are literally thousands of diet plans, eating guidelines, diet programs that come with a diet, book stores have aisles dedicated to only weight loss and weight loss cookbooks. You can't turn on the tv, open a magazine, get on Facebook or twitter or even fox news with out hearing about the latest trend in weight loss.

Justin and I chose an approach that many would see as extreme, but it has really worked very well for us. I could talk about plant based eating for hours, I love to educate friends and family about our lifestyle because not only have we had great successes with watching the number on the scale drop, we just feel better!

Justin and I are blessed with amazing friends who are willing to try new things, so we hosted our first dinner party since moving to VA, and we served all Better Than Vegan food.

What is BTV, you ask? Oh I am glad you did! Justin and I coined the term when we first began the Daniel Fast in January 2012. The Daniel Fast is a 21 day partial fast where you eliminate all meat, dairy, added sugar, white flour, yeast, and any chemical from your diet. You essentially eat only fruits, veggies, whole grains, beans, nuts, and water to drink. This is meant to take your focus off of food and place that focus on the Lord and using your body in service to Him. It is meant to take that idol of food out of your life, and allow you to worship only Him.

In the first few days of the fast it isn't all smiles and happy feelings, in fact it is terrible. As you go cold turkey eliminating all of the processed junk and chemicals from your diet your body literally goes through a detox, and you are like a drug addict during detox...it isn't pretty. Justin coined the term Worse Than Vegan, because at least vegans can eat bread.

But just as alcoholics come out of the detox feeling better than ever and loving their new addiction free life, so did we. We began to feel lighter, in control, closer to each other, and most importantly closer to the Lord. We were able to take the control back from the food that had reigned over us for so many years. After the 21 day Daniel Fast was over, we decided to keep going. So Worse Than Vegan became Better Than Vegan. And not only does BTV encompass the diet we choose, it also gives us the freedom to eat other things in small quantities every once in a while. So you're thinking oh, they never eat meat I couldn't do that I love steak too much...so do we! So every once in a while, about 3 times a year, Justin and I will go out to dinner and eat a steak. But it is no ordinary steak, oh no.....it is only the best of the steaks because we are not going to waste our night out and our time of abstinence from red meat on any old steak. It teaches you to really appreciate it when you splurge. We also have added back in a few things like shakeologey (which is very close to being BTV), honey, coffee, red wine, beer, and the occasional margarita! The difference between the way we treated the things we have added back in now is that it is in small quantities.

 So onto the story of the party! Justin's friend at work, Dani, has been wanting to add in more plant based foods into her diet, but she didn't know where to begin in preparing them. We had been talking with her for months about trying to come down and hang out on a weekend and we would cook for her. Well life in VA is insane and everyone is always very busy so it had taken us forever to get that day planned. Finally we both had a Saturday that would work, and we decided to have everyone over that we had wanted to have come over for months! So the BTV dinner party was born.

I absolutely love being a hostess! It was so much fun to watch everyone mingle and meet and new friendships being made right in my family room! We had several friends from church with their kids, my friends Ashley and Jeff from the gym and their 3 handsome sons, and Dani and her boyfriend! It was a blast!

We had red and white wine, some beers from the local brewery, and here is the menu:

Major's homemade salsa, guacamole, corn cilantro salsa, cowboy caviar, and a hummus I buy at Costco with tortilla chips, cracklesnacks (veggie crackers that rock), and pop chips to dip for appatizers.

Then we had oven roasted asparagus, grilled veggie kabobs, amazing grilled portabello caps, and quinoa with tomatoes and green chilies.

I made a fruit salad, and Justin was going to grill pineapple for dessert but we were all so full from the main course we forgot to put it out!

We also had about 10 kids at the house so we served them hot dogs (yes all beef) and they had an ice cream bar for dessert where they got to choose the toppings.

All and all everyone liked the food, and had a great time! I am already excited to plan the next dinner party. Justin says it needs to be a bring your own meat party to off set this one....we shall see!

Thank you to all of our friends for coming and having an open mind about the food!

Oh and check out my fun outfit I wore to the party....My mom got me this outfit for Christmas! I love it!

 

 

Make the change!

People ask me pretty much everyday how I did it. How did you lose the weight? How do you eat so strictly? Why can't I lose the weight? How do you find time to get to the gym everyday?

It comes down to being ready to make the change. Being ready to make a complete 180 degree change from eating poorly and not exercising to eating REAL, healthy, food and getting off your duff and doing the work. I looked for an easy way out for 10 years...it does not exist! Truly losing weight is a matter of burning more calories than you are consuming and working your body so it can convert fat to muscle.

So there it is! You MUST be ready to make the change. No person, company, or diet plan can do it for you. Sure you can do it half assed and lose a few lbs and a couple inches but trust me when I say it will not be lasting. This is not something that you do for a season, it is a lifestyle. I have been working out at the same gym pretty much every week day for over a year. What I have found is that at the time I go, I see the same faces everyday. The same people are there, their kids are in kids club everyday. Our gym has amazing people working in their child care. Madison has been going since she was 5 months old, and she loves those girls! Bethany can't wait to go to see her friends on the evenings we go to the gym. Sure a few new people come and go with the seasons (esp the new year...that is entertaining to see all of the new years resolution members come in hard core for a week, hurt themselves, and take a break until next January) but for the most part the members stay the same.

So it is about a commitment. Not to a gym or eating plan or health coach but to yourself. Do you need an eating plan? Absolutely! Do you need a gym? It's either that or one of the amazing team beachbody workouts you can purchase here: http://beachbodycoach.com/esuite/home/ryanmajor
If you are interested in health coaching shoot me an email! I can get you in touch with someone in your area who can provide amazing services!

My husband and I have made this 180. and we are still working out daily and eating real food. Do we treat ourselves? Yes!! Do we believe in loving ourselves? YES!! It's not about restriction, its about taking care of our bodies so we can be good stewards of our blessings!

Hello, is anyone out there?

I have missed blogging this month so much! It has been very strange to miss out on sharing my experiences with y'all. Really there isn't much of an excuse other than being crazy busy. We got back from our beach trip today, and it was really nice to get away.

I was able to get a good workout in at the hotel gym, and we walked a ton around all of the sights of VA beach. We were able to say no to a timeshare presentation, and didn't totally ruin our progress with our diets, although we did stray from being totally vegan. We ate some tuna, and Justin had a lovely piece of salmon last night. All and all we did great.

M day is tomorrow. I am not anticipating a huge number of lbs lost this month. As much as that stinks, I hit a HUGE mile stone...A SIZE 6!!!!!Never in my life have I worn a size 6. I remember buying womens' size 16 in junior high, if that tells you anything about my size progression. Here is a photo of the girls and I on our balcony, me wearing my size 6 pants from Ann Taylor!

 Another huge milestone was wearing a bikini this weekend. I wore one on my honeymoon and to spring break junior year of college, but was very self conscious on those trips. This time I wasn't! So exciting.

Justin and I were just talking over dinner about vacation and food. I was telling him that I felt kind of guilty for eating things that weren't on our plan this weekend. He said he didn't feel guilty because we should never deprive ourselves. We should never say, "I Can't" rather we should look at it like I can eat whatever I want, but I choose to make smart food choices.

Such a great mindset to have, I wish I had totally rewired my thinking the way he has, but after 15 years or so of dieting I will take some reprogramming.

Another awesome thing that happened this month, aside from the beach trip and Justin & Bethany's birthdays was the launch of Major's Motivation! Not the blog, but the health coaching side of it! I was asked to speak at a women's event and share my story, I used this as my springboard to launching my health coaching business.

As you all know the Major's are a continuous progress and we strive to never stop moving forward. This business is all about helping become the best version of themselves by reaching 1 small goal at a time. For more info or to become a Major's Motivation client please send me an email at majorsmotivation@gmail.com

Using Major's Motivation to help people reclaim their health and take charge of their bodies from the inside out is so important to Justin and I. Check back tomorrow for M-day April results!!

Here we are enjoying our first vacation as a family of 4. My husband is so adorable, and doesn't he look 10 years younger after ditching those pesky 80lbs?

When Mama Ain't Healthy, Aint Nobody Healthy

I have never been one of those moms who will make dinner for my husband and I to eat, and something different for the kids. Nope, sorry not gonna happen. You get to eat whatever I am making. You get what you get, and you don't throw a fit! For the longest time we never had any fits to worry about because we were eating all of the junk that kids love to eat too. Sure I would make a lot of chicken dinners with bread and a veggie, maybe even a salad. But there was no shortage of butter on the veggies and potatoes, always lots of cheese, ranch dressing, and don't forget Nana's bbq sauce. Not there is anything wrong with Nana's sauce, seriously that sauce may be the link to world peace. But I think that a few months ago Bethany could really relate to this commercial.... (minus the Eggos, she wasn't that lucky)

Okay so here's the deal. We have all heard the phrase when Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. That is true for so many aspects of our lives. Diet, exercise, and self image are no exception. As the mom in my household I have the responsibility to teach my girls habits that they will keep their entire lives. If I teach them to eat burgers and fries, drink only soda, and never exercise should I be shocked when they end up being overweight and leading a sedentary lifestyle? Should I also be shocked if they only hear me saying negative things about my body when they question their own self worth or the way they look in the mirror?

Having the realization that my girls are going to model my behaviors was hard enough, but then to take it a step further and think that they will also model the way I view my own body...whoa...talk about convicting.

Mom's it is up to us to set the standard in our homes. We are responsible for these precious little lives and spirits....don't let them think for one second that they are not beautiful. Teach them habits that will make it easy for them to be healthy, set the bar high for you and your husband AND your children.

I have had several people ask me what our kids are eating now that we are eating a plant based, pretty much the daniel fast diet all the time. Well Bethany is almost 7 and she has been a little bit of a tough convert. Although she LOVES salad and most veggies, it is hard to convince her to eat tofu (hard to convince me too actually). We still have our own form of spaghetti and she will eat that up with out any argument. The harder things are the meals when it's mostly beans and quinuoa with a steamed veggie. But I know that if I roast asparagus she will eat the entire pan of it.

In the mornings she has multigrain cheerios with skim milk or toast (no butter, only honey). Lunch she packs everyday (no way would I force her to eat the crap they serve in public schools...balanced meal my patooty). I usually make her a sandwich with natural pb and honey and sometimes its turkey and cheese always on whole wheat bread, carrot sticks or celery depending on what we have, pickle, apple or orange, and water. For dinner she eats whatever we make, yes even if it is something random like tofu with diced tomatoes and veggies over a baked potato.

It wasn't an immediate thing, the first month or so of us eating this way I would make her some shrimp or chicken and she would eat our meal as her sides, but now she is used to it. Yes she has gone to bed without finishing her dinner, and yes it has been trying at times, but she knows what nutrients are in which veggies and she is starting to get into it. She LOVES the hulk juice (green smoothies) and she loves the spaghetti that we make. She also loves her oranges!

Madison is almost 1, so she eats anything I put in front of her. Her favorites are broccoli, asparagus, peas, and potatoes! I do give her cheese about once a week for lunch because she looooves it!

I think that the most important thing we can teach our children when it comes to food is that it does not rule our lives. We do not live to eat, we eat to live. So much of our lives is totally based around food. Going out to dinners, cake at special occasions, etc. Using food as a reward has been a hard habit to break for us, not only for our children but for ourselves too. Finding new things to use as rewards has required more thought put into those rewards but wouldn't your children respond more to those rewards? Mine have! Bethany loves that she can get a video from redbox or go to funland or get her nails painted or pick out a new shirt or or or...

Have fun with it yall and it keeps you on track!! Having the whole family motivated to reach their own goals, weight loss or otherwise keeps all of us on track! Justin and I are working towards our health goals, Bethany is working on her goals of learning to play piano and finish first grade and remember her weekly bible verses for Good News Club, and Madison is learning to WALK!